Ruling on marrying a woman who is not righteous
Question:
Many [Muslim] brothers - who are religiously committed - when proceeding to get married, they choose to ask in marriage women who are not religiously committed under the claim of inviting them the right Islamic way, turning a blind eye to women who are religiously committed. So, our Sheikh, what is your advice regarding this issue? May Allah reward you.
Answer:
What I would like to advise the Sunni husband is to choose a woman who brings him happiness in his worldly life as well as in the Hereafter. In other words he should choose the righteous wife who preserves her religion both in words and deeds, sticks to its values and morals, guards her husband’s right and protects his children.
This is among the meanings of virtue, righteousness and chastity that Islam is heavily concerned with. Nevertheless, the one who proceeds to marry a woman who is devoid of these meanings and gets deceived by her beauty, rank and lineage; then he is more likely to get afflicted by the tribulation of loosing himself and his children (their religion), forasmuch as it is difficult to change a woman who has a deep love of the worldly pleasures and relies on the adornment of this life, as the saying goes: “The same you are raised up, the same you will be when you are old (Habit is a second nature)”, and “Whoever has constantly a given quality or character, shall grow up with it”.
Even more, it is feared that he will be attracted to her character and fall into her temptations, and accordingly he will drift away from what he was yearning for the meanings of the Islamic life that unite people on the love and obedience of Allah عزَّ وجلَّ; therefore, he will regret what he tempted in, so “Select the pious woman, may you be blessed” 1.
Reported by Al-Bukhârî (5090), by Muslim (1/ 670) (n° 1466), by Abû Dâwûd (2047), by An-Naşâ’î (3230), by Ibn Mâjah (1858) and by Ahmad (9521), from the hadith of Abû Hurayrah. ↩
