Ruling on a husband who treats his wife unjustly


Question:

I was married twenty-five years ago; I have a number of sons and daughters. I face a lot of problems with my husband, because he humiliates me a lot in front of my children and in front of relatives and strangers. He does not respect me at all, for no reason. I can only relax when he is outside the home. Please note that this man offers Salah (Prayer) and fears Allah. I hope that you can tell me the right thing to do. May Allah reward you with the best!

Answer:

You have to be patient and advise him in the way that is best. Remind him of Allah and the Last Day: perhaps he will respond and come back to the right path, and quit this bad behavior. If he does not respond, then the sin will be on him and you will have great reward for your patience and for putting up with his offensive behavior. It is prescribed for you to make Du’a (supplication) for him in your Salah and at other times, that Allah will guide him to the straight path, bless him with a good attitude, and that He will protect you from his evil and the evil of others.

You also have to check yourself and follow your religion properly. Repent to Allah from any bad deeds and sins that you may have committed with regard to Allah’s Rights, your husband’s rights, and the rights of anyone else. Perhaps, he has been sent against you because of some sins that you have committed. Allah (Glorified be He) says: “And whatever of misfortune befalls you, it is because of what your hands have earned. And He pardons much. (See the Qur’ân Verse 35:45).” [Al-Shura: 30]

There is no reason why you should not ask his father or mother or older siblings or other respected relatives or neighbors to advise and direct him to treat his family well. Allah (Glorified be He) says: “…and live with them honourably.” [Al-Nisa: 19]

Allah (Glorified and Exalted be He) also says: “And they (women) have rights (over their husbands as regards living expenses) similar (to those of their husbands) over them (as regards obedience and respect) according to what is reasonable, but men have a degree (of responsibility) over them.” [Al-Baqarah: 228]

May Allah put things right between you, guide your husband and bring him back to the right path of goodness and guidance! He is the Most Generous, Most Kind.